samkaczur

I feel shy coming on here!

I have been insanely busy.  My new website is up but if you read my previous journals I have a lot... lot going on at home.  One of my friends was diagnosed with bipolar... insane ride... literally.  And now another of my friends died... due to a doctor's mistake. It breaks my heart.  Really...

My health is going up and down and I am just wanting to relax for once!!!  I may plan a week away to travel alone in the fall, just so I can screw my head back on.

All my photoshoots are postponed right now and my editing as well.  There is just too much I need to sort out and do before I am able to focus fully on my work!  GETTING HEALTHY!  I need to badly as its sad that I am exhausted from walking up 4 flights of stairs and having to nap after it.  Tired of pain meds and the like! GRR!

Ok calming down.  SO!  Please check out my website!!!  And tell me what you think!!!

www.samkaczur.com/ www.samkaczur.com/ www.samkaczur.com/ www.samkaczur.com/ www.samkaczur.com/ www.samkaczur.com/ www.samkaczur.com/

Hello!

Sorry for the sudden stop in activity.  Many many things have gone on in the past week.

- family issues
- friends taking advantage of me and my photography
- getting my new website up
- my laptop died and is in repair
- health went down hill again... YAY

The last is the thing that is consuming most of my time.  A dear friend of mine is going through many many health problems and I am helping his family cope since I am the only one who knows what he could be going through.  I just hate the stigma this area has created on Mental health.  Its sad and revolting.  Its demeaning and I wish it would stop!  Just because blood isn't pouring out of a wound doesn't mean it isn't there.  It can't be healed with just a pill or band aid.  IT DOES TAKE TIME.  It does take weeks, months and sometimes YEARS for things to get to a stable state.  You don't see cancer patients dancing a jig after one bit of surgery.  All I can say to them is to hold on and realize things will get better.  I do wish they would get his meds right.  I wish it would be easier on the family. Maybe easier on me is a subliminal message my body is hinting at.

I hope you all are fine and coping with life!  I have shoots planned and big ideas.  All of which are on hold until I can get better once again.

Maybe there is a relaxing and smooth trail after this all rolls over.

SK

Haha random journal but this made me laugh so hard. I'll tell you a story.

So, I was sitting in the kitchen, on my laptop, browsing DeviantArt when I heard a strange buzzing, not any type of buzzing. I had ignored-- by now-- the buzzing of various other bugs, but this was louder, deeper and more powerful, like a mini helicopter.  I looked up, to see, right beside me was a giant hornet-esk type bug.  My eyes grew large as it browsed the colourful photos of DA just like me.  I stayed still, unsure of how this bug reacted to movement.  

Eventually it got bored with the deviations, something a bug can not appreciate fully, and decided to fly at the window. Thud. Thud. Thud. As it preoccupied itself with ramming its head against the invisible force I decided to grab a glass and trap it, which I did successfully.  I am the type not to kill but trap and release.  No point in harming an insect because it flew through the door you left open. So when I had it successfully on the windowsill, (and proclaimed him Gerald) the buzzing in the glass got louder.  So pissed off that its movement were further restricted.  Like a crazy kid on ecstasy Gerald seizured against the glass, me watching, my thoughts like this:

"He looks pissed off.  He's big.  If I let him free, will he fly away thankful? Or sting me until I am swollen and filled with venom."

A brilliant idea came to mind, Google.  Ah yes, the savior of all time. I knew it was a hornet but unsure.  It was pretty black for a yellow jacket hornet. And four times as big (in my opinion). So scrolling through the images on Google I had found Gerald! A bald-faced hornet (en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bald-fac…).  After reading that link and a few others, his 'pissed off' buzzing meant... yeah he was going to sting me, repeatedly though I saved his life.  I've been stung before by other wasps, hornets and the like, so I was not willing to take the chance.  Suddenly I found an interesting link that cracked me up.  Though the descriptions are weird, that is exactly how it feels.

Schmidt Sting Pain Index

* 1.0 Sweat bee: Light, ephemeral, almost fruity. A tiny spark has singed a single hair on your arm.
* 1.2 Fire ant: Sharp, sudden, mildly alarming. Like walking across a shag carpet and reaching for the light switch.
* 1.8 Bullhorn acacia ant: A rare, piercing, elevated sort of pain. Someone has fired a staple into your cheek.
* 2.0 Bald-faced hornet: Rich, hearty, slightly crunchy. Similar to getting your hand mashed in a revolving door.
* 2.0 Yellowjacket: Hot and smoky, almost irreverent. Imagine W. C. Fields extinguishing a cigar on your tongue.
* 2.x Honey bee and European hornet: Like a matchhead that flips off and burns on your skin.
* 3.0 Red harvester ant: Bold and unrelenting. Somebody is using a drill to excavate your ingrown toenail.
* 3.0 Paper wasp: Caustic and burning. Distinctly bitter aftertaste. Like spilling a beaker of hydrochloric acid on a paper cut.
* 4.0 Pepsis wasp: Blinding, fierce, shockingly electric. A running hair drier has been dropped into your bubble bath.
* 4.0+ Bullet ant: Pure, intense, brilliant pain. Like fire-walking over flaming charcoal with a 3-inch rusty nail in your heel.

My eyes shifted from this hornet, Gerald, to the screen of my laptop.  He was looking right at me not buzzing around, not looking out at the blue sky.  At me, oh the glare of death.

I did not feel like testing out the pain.  Revolving doors are crunchy when your hand gets caught.  Well I found an ingenious way of releasing him and saving myself from the metaphorical revolving door of death by putting him on a mesh-like table with holes he could crawl out of.  With me safe inside he went on his own way after a while.

Though I reread over and over the descriptions, the pain comparable and hilarious.  I would never in my life compare a sting to a revolving door. I have sympathy for those who flail and get stung by hornets like Gerald.  May he live long and prosper... just not near me.

Yes, I got suckered into getting twitter.

twitter.com/samkaczur follow me!